Where is your joy?

I have about 2000 wedding photos to edit and another 30+ bridal images to edit, and a maternity session to prepare for. Ugg. As much as I adore and have a passion for photography – and yes, I still want a photography degree, the business end is not really fun. Yesterday I dropped everything and cleaned house. Cleaned my sewing room more specifically. Just seeing the shiny hardwood made me SO happy. Then, though I'm not known for my abilities in the kitchen, I tried a new recipe and it was SO yummy, and I was so happy. Next, I finished another pair of shorts for Lacey, helped Travis assemble our new patio furniture, helped with some homework and I was STILL SO HAPPY.
I have a tendency to get so infatuated with learning and growing (specifically in photograph as of late) that I forget about all of the simple things that really do make me happy – like shiny hardwood floors. I've decided that maybe I need to stop perusing “joy” so hard ! If I stop for a minute it's right in front of me!! In conclusion:
1) I think the trick to all this is finding balance, and right now I'm all out of sync.
2) I'm never 100% satisfied with myself. I'm critical of every photo I take, every meal I cook, etc.. UGG. There needs to be 3 of me to get everything done – the way I want it.
3) I'm wondering when I really KNOW, for sure, what it is I'm supposed to be doing with my life.
Maybe I just need to go clean some closets...

"Arriving at destination, on right."

If you have a GPS in you car, you have probably heard this phrase. My GPS voice has a British accent which I simply adore. Something melodic and easy about that accent, simple yet eloquent. I have been beating myself up lately, wondering if I will ever feel that I have truly “arrived.” Have I met the destination I have been traveling towards, or have I just blazed by checkpoints and kept going. My list of checkpoints and destinations is fogging my brain. Here are a few:

1. I don't write enough. I have a blasted English degree and I don't write – not even this puny blog. WHY? FEAR. I'm a coward. I know I have very judgmental eyes that read my blog, and maybe I'm just afraid of failure, or being labeled, judged. But, alas, it is time to write. I've started a novel – because the story in bits and pieces has been in my head for over two years, and it's time to put it on paper. As for blogging, I had decided to write on my photo blog, but I prefer the Blogger set-up; it's just easier. So I'm back to blogging – I even have it on my calendar.

2. I want another degree. I'm seriously considering going back to college either for a masters, or start over and earning a photography degree. No, no dinky tech “joy of photography class.” I want the full blown, real deal. Maybe in a few years.....I'll never grow tired of photography.

3. All my children will be in school next year. WOW. I need to work on ME. I've already started this journey, but next year I'll have more time to refine things a bit. I've lost nearly 40 pounds, and I am thrilled, but there is still work to be done!

4. Sewing and music. They seem to get pushed to the end, but they need some revitalizing as well. I sewed my daughter 6 pairs of ruffle shorts for summer this week, and I practiced a dozen on so hymns on my flute. I'm petrified of losing or forgetting what I worked so long and hard to acquire...

So, have I arrived? Heck no. Not by a long shot. I could add 10 more things to this list and still not be finished. I am hard on myself though, and I have to wonder, will I be 80 years old and still feel like I have yet to arrive. I hope not. The mere thought gives my chills....

Me and my biggest fan - gosh I love this man! (Blogger is making the picture look BAD though - I will have to figure out why...

Time

I'm simply in awe of how quickly time seems to be passing lately. It seems the world may be spinning a bit faster that I want it to. My children are growing up right before my eyes – if I could just freeze them for a while I would so love it. I will have a high school freshman, a new “middle schooler,” a fourth grader, and my baby girl has only one more year at home. WOW. Just yesterday I had toddlers, just yesterday I was changing diapers. I was a “new” mom. At 35 I'm feeling incredibly “middle-aged” lately! But, new doors are opening, new chapters unfolding. I'm enjoying all the new adventures that have come knocking at my door lately. I'm excited to open the door and let the new experiences change our lives for the better. I'm waking up each day looking forward to what's ahead – and what's ahead looks just as awesome as what I've left behind each night as I close my eyes. Hard work really does pay off – in more ways than I could ever put into words. Time, fast and furious, brings everything to light – it cannot be escaped – so I'm embracing it!

POTW - Simple Pleasures

Today has been great - spent some time with a dear friend on her birthday and did a lot of packing. Sometimes a "hum drum" day makes my wheels start turning. When it's all said and done, these low key days are simple pleasures. Time to piddle, take some photos, just enjoy a beautiful day.

My "Simple Pleasure" List:

Photography (I can't get enough - my total PASSION!)
sewing (nothing makes m happier than my daughter in my dress)
Sunshine (Can you say, "Spring Fever??")
Chocolate (DOVE. love)
Books (I could be completely surrounded...)
Trustworthy friends (and anyone who knows me knows, I take secrets to my GRAVE, LOL)
Family Time (I adore my family. My husband is my loyal, faithful, ROCK.)
"PINK" lotion from Victoria's Secret (TO DIE FOR)

I could go on and on.....

Enjoying a "down" day with my girl:

Life!

I love blogging. I really, really do. However, time has not been on my side lately! We have been so busy and it's only going to get busier in the next few weeks! The weather is getting warmer (WHOHOO!), baseball season is beginning, we closed on our new home on Friday – so many new beginnings for our family. I'm bursting with excitement. I have plans on top of plans, my calendar is filling up. Life is taking off in an amazing way and I feel extremely blessed. My mom always tells me, “just keep doing what you know is right....” This is what I've been doing, as best as I can, and the parts and pieces of my life are coming together; great new business, new house, health, happiness – I'm overwhelmed. Please forgive me for the lack of blogging – I'm busy living!

Taken on the grounds of our new home!

POTW - Books

SO, I don't like this photo but my life has suddenly gotten SUPER crazy - in a good way though. I don't have time to re-take! I LOVE books - English major here people! I love the smell of them, the feel of crispy pages, falling apart or brand new, books are wonderful! I never studied in my dorm in college if I could help it. I always found a quiet spot on the second floor of the library to get my study time in. Something comforting about being completely surrounded by words!

POTW - Peace and Comfort

So, I'm terribly far behind of photo-of-the-week assignments. I'll have to make up “signs” at some point, but for now, I'm just going to push forward!
Peace and comfort can come in many forms for me. I have found that when I am the most “at peace” are the times when my family is all together. Caleb and Dylan go to their dad's every other weekend. While I think they are safe there, I never have the complete feeling of comfort that I have when all my kids are in my sight – under my wing. There is just something calming (and wonderful) about being able to check into bedrooms at night and see all my children safe and snug. This weekend we had snow. WHOHOO! I am so thankful that is snowed THIS weekend, while everyone was home. I'm thankful that mother nature timed the snow so that I got to witness the sheer happiness of snowball fights, snowmen, red noses and frozen grins. Peace and comfort in the freezing snow is a magical thing.

Grandma's Quilt

In a world full of plastic, fast and cheaply made items, we sometimes lose perspective on how easy “things” are for us to acquire now. We want a new blanket for our bed, we simply drive to the nearest Target and pick out one. We bring it home, slap it on our bed and when we crawl in at night feel the warmth of our new purchase. During the short time ago that was my father's childhood, the quilt that kept him warm at night was painstakingly and lovingly made by his mother. My grandmother, who died before my birth, sewed all her children's clothes and bedding. My father was the youngest of 10 children, so this was no small task. The quilt that has always been my favorite was made from flour sacks. Some pieces are so tiny, I would have probably just trashed them. My grandmother, however, didn't live in my fast and easy world. She saved every tiny scrap to create this hand stitched quilt. I remember it on my bed throughout my childhood as well. It was almost like an “Eye Spy” game to me – every time I'd look at it I'd notice another interesting fabric. This quilt is extra special – the small hand embroidered hand print is my father's hand print. She stitched “1955” and a number “4” in the center of the hand. My father's hand was so tiny when he was 4 – he was little once too, and thanks to a grandmother who must have always wanted to remember the size of his tiny hand, now I get to witness it too. This quilt is nothing short of a work-of-art to me. I hope to one day leave something this special for my future grandchildren, and that they will appreciate “handmade.”

Old Farmers Advice

Found this on a friend's blog and loved it too much not to pass along! Wonderful advice, so much of it seeming really relevant to my life at one point or another!

Old Farmers Advice:

Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong.

Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.

A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.

Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.

Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.

Forgive your enemies; it messes up their heads.

Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.

It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.

You cannot unsay a cruel word.

Every path has a few puddles.

When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

The best sermons are lived, not preached.

Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway.

Don't judge folks by their relatives.

Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time.

Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't bothering you none.

Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.

The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, watches you from the mirror every mornin'.

Always drink upstream from the herd.

Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

POTW- Sweet

I have to admit, I have a lot of “sweet” in my life. When I think about all the syrupy sweet deliciousness I have in my life I realize that I'm incredibly blessed. What's even more amazing is that I probably don't deserve half of this yumminess. I decided upon my one “sweet” based upon this photo of Lacey and Travis; wonderful daddy, husband, and love of my life.
The father/daughter relationship is so important to me. Being close to my own father, I know how many times I relied on his strong and sincere backbone to pull me through. Lacey will be my shopping buddy, she will share a love of pink and purses, shoes and such, but there is nothing quite like the way she runs to greet her Daddy every evening when he returns from work. She puts her hands on his cheeks and squeezes him like she hasn't seen him in weeks. It's a sweet, sweet love. She has him wrapped around her little finger!